Musical Instruments

In-Car Pianos

Shortly before three o’clock in the morning last night,1 I was opening up the dashboard in my car, for what reason I cannot now recall. Having uncovered the innards of the vehicle’s control system, I noticed a large number of mechanical buttons or keys, which were linked to some padded hammer mechanisms whose purpose seemed […]

Book Review: Beginning Clarinet for the Moderately Intelligent

Ryan Rocifero And His Clarinet We didn’t know that Ryan Rocifero was interested in the clarinet until we heard squeals as of pigs being cruelly tortured issuing from the basement of our building. Rushing down the stairs, we found him—Ryan Rocifero, that is—using (or attempting to use) a book called Beginning Clarinet for the Moderately […]

A Triplet of Limericks

Triplane image based on a public domain image by Dryke, available at

A 3-in-1 special! A Flying News exclusive! * * * The Musical Dunce There once was a right funny fellow who played on the bass and the cello. He thought himself clever when he played them together, ’til he fell to the ground with a bellow. * * * A Woman Named Sue There once […]