Fire

Matilda

Who told Lies, and was Burned to Death Matilda told such Dreadful Lies, It made one Gasp and Stretch one’s Eyes; Her Aunt, who, from her Earliest Youth, Had kept a Strict Regard for Truth, Attempted to Believe Matilda: The effort very nearly killed her, And would have done so, had not She Discovered this […]

Things to Do in a Dentist’s Waiting Room

Have you ever found yourself sitting in a dentist’s waiting room, wondering how to pass the time while listening idly to the gentle sounds of the office: the soft whine of the drill, the subtle rattle of the bone saw, and the other patients’ muted screams of agony? If you have encountered this quandary, if […]

Book Review: Cheesy Stories for Walrus Lovers

Morris, Stephen Q. Cheesy Stories for Walrus Lovers. Santa Ana, CA: Cheesy Stories, 2015. 192 pp., $13.55, cheap grayish paper. Following on the mediocre success of Cheesy Stories for Browns Fans and Cheesy Stories for 39 Year Old Female College Students, Cheesy Stories, Inc. has come out with a new book: Cheesy Stories for Walrus […]

Holiday UncheerĀ©

Cheer, as everyone knows, can mean (among various other meanings that I am not interested in discussing today) three distinct things: (1) A feeling of gaiety, mirth, or cheerfulness;1 (2) A loud shout or acclamation expressing applause, joy, enthusiasm, cheer (1), or approbation; and (3) Alcoholic beverages of all kinds, particularly those set forth to […]

Ferris Wheel Stuck Upside-Down

Upside-down Ferris wheel

One of the most popular rides at fairs and amusement parks, the Ferris wheel is usually considered one of the safest, a ride for all ages. However, as sometimes happens with roller coasters and other such amusements, one Ferris wheel at a fair in Downpatrick, Northern Ireland, recently got stuck upside-down. The cars were filled […]