Beer

Fender Bender Support Group for Traumatised Motorists

Anti-Theft windscreen scraper.

The latest support group taking over the world is a bit of a crash-course in handling trauma from minor automobile accidents. A growing number of motorists is finding solace in the Official Fender Bender Support Group (OFBSG), which takes its name from the informal American term for a minor road accident. The OFBSG began just […]

Fine Beers and Craft Wines

Have you ever wondered why there are no craft wines? Why wines can be fine, but only beer is ever craft. The impression this terminology produces is that brewers are master craftsmen, subtle geniuses bulging with wizardly skill and arcane expertise. Winemakers, or vintners, on the other hand, are just not. That’s not to say […]

Some Statistics You Might Find Interesting

Largest number of simultaneous nose pickers: 1,293,2991 How often the average American™ belches: 17 times per day2 Average age at which the average American™ finds a permanent full-time job: 33.45 years3 Number of bubbles in a glass of beer: 12,394,1294 Percentage of those under twenty who value their Playstation more than their parents: 74.3%5 Percentage […]

The Man Who Drank Beer (a limerick)

Triplane image based on a public domain image by Dryke, available at http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Tripe_silhouette.PNG.

There once was a man who drank beer ’til it flowed from the holes in his ears. He never got drunk, though he certainly stunk, and was always the subject of cheers. More News: G. K. Chesterton on Beer Yes, We Were Inspired by Beer Pete the Snowman (a limerick) The Lighthearted Dude (a limerick)

Why We Like Lists

You may have noticed that lists are very popular these days. Nine out of ten blog posts incorporate some kind of list, and, according to one study1 the typical American spends approximately ninety-seven minutes daily dealing with lists of one sort or another. This fascination with lists is not, however, an entirely new thing: archeologists […]

How to Influence People

At The Flying News, we have a fairly significant body of experience trying to influence people. Most of this experience has been obtained by attempting to convince merchants to provide us with free doughnuts, and even though we have always failed in our attempts, we feel prepared to give (possibly) helpful advice on this moderately […]

Spicy Food

Not so very long ago, I was wandering about at random with my children, when we happened upon a small market (or equivalent) selling a wide variety of spicy sauces, spicy condiments, spicy salsas, and, as far as I could tell, not much else. In a boldly calculated move to entice customers, the retail establishment […]