Outlandish antique computer.

Dear Sirs,
We regret to inform you that the after-burner on your self-regulating laser-powered discombobulator has expired, and you will need to purchase a new set of fuel packs to re-energise it. If you choose not to purchase the update, the software on your discombobulator and all saved settings will be encrypted and a new registration code will be needed to re-enable your device. Moreover, we will kidnap your mother, your brother, your daughters, and your pet chameleon until you send us loads of dough, AKA money, preferably in bitcoin, though we also accept pounds sterling and American (not Canadian) dollars. We are very friendly and value your business. Thank you for being a Valued Customer of Big Software Unlimited.

The Man

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