Judd, Terry N. The Eater’s Guide to the Doughnut: The Doughnut as Inspiration for Life, Love, Happiness, and Transcendent Communion with the Universe. Northern South Dakota University Press, 2015, 624.6 pp., $47.55 vellum.
As a general rule, I like books. Most of them are compact, many are portable, and nearly all are still legible after you drop them in the bathtub or off the roof. And their batteries seem to hold a charge for years at a time—I don’t think I’ve charged any of mine in the last decade. Some of them also make effective defensive weapons,1 and they have also been used as short range offensive weapons. 2
Anyway, since I like books so much, and The Eater’s Guide to the Doughnut is a book, it seems a reasonable deduction that I like The Eater’s Guide. And, despite editorial policy, I actually read this book before reviewing it, so I have a pretty good idea which words it contains and which words are left out.
One of the most prominently featured words was ‘doughnut’, which appeared a total of 873 times, not including its appearance in the title. Also commonly occurring were the words ‘enlightenment’ (768 times), ‘fry’ (698 times), ‘fat’ (697 times), ‘putrid’ (573 times), and ‘gastromancy’ (431 times).
Despite its 624.6 pages, there were quite a few words not found in the book. The most notable was ‘calorie’, which was not found more than 479 times. Also not found in the book were the words ‘Buddhism’ (387 times)—even though the book obviously draws heavily on the teachings of Mahayana Buddhism—’ranivorous’ (342 times), and ‘malarkey’ (301 times).
All in all, the book was long, lively, and especially interesting to those interested in telling fortunes by listening to people’s stomachs rumbling. If you are looking for a book that tells you how and why to make your own doughnuts, this could be the book for you. It is appropriate for readers of both sexes, between the ages 37 and 39.
- For real world examples, see http://www.9news.com.au/world/2014/11/21/09/50/bag-full-of-books-stops-random-bullet-fired-at-university-student and http://www.cnn.com/2014/02/25/us/ohio-bible-stops-bullet/index.html. ↩
- The author of this review was once brutally attacked with a book, and can still remember clearly the feeling of confusion and bewilderment which resulted. ↩