Theme Weddings

From the very name, you can almost certainly guess what a theme wedding is: a wedding with a theme. “But,” you might be inclined to respond, “so what?” If you don’t have any plans for a wedding in the near future, your unthinking reaction could well be to think that a theme wedding is, in […]

Camouflage for the Office

A new line of clothing by OfficeWear Max promises to improve your workday, reduce stress, and free up lots of time. The company, an off-shoot of Military Uniforms United, recently introduced a line of camouflaging office attire. Marketing director Sarah Woolard of OfficeWear Max stated, “Our new line of camouflage will help you blend right […]

Product Review: Boss-Mode Hammock

Does your work interfere with your relaxation? Do you find yourself sitting at a desk when you’d rather be reclining? Technology hasn’t yet enabled you to be in your office working at the same time that you’re at the beach surfing, but all the same, the Boss-Mode Hammock is a major advance in the possibilities […]

A Manifesto on Censorship

Friends, Enemies, Readers of The Flying News wherever you may be, for too long now a little noticed, but very grave, practice has been disfiguring our public life. To what do I refer? Well, let me tell you the story of how I came to be aware of this menace to civilization. As Heraclitus said, […]

To Combat Unemployment, Oregon Will Use Manual Traffic Lights

In August of this year, 139,010 persons were officially unemployed in the state of Oregon, making the unemployment rate© 7.2%, which is more than 18% above the national average unemployment rate of 6.1%. This is of great concern to someone in the state government. Furthermore, it just so happens that Oregon has exactly 105,763.2 traffic […]

Step Aside, Tea: Coffee is Where It’s At

A coffee drinker.

Real Men Drink Coffee The political anti-tax group known as the tea party used to be the last word in extreme American politics. This year, though, the tea party just isn’t extreme enough. “Governing is a privilege, not a right,” argues Alexander Gottlieb, of Plymouth, WI, “and rather than taxing us, the government ought to […]

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