Clean Trash Technology

Blurbs for the Depressed

Have you ever wondered . . . about those little cheery quotes on the back of books (sometimes known as blurbs)? Who could possibly be that glowingly gushing? Nobody I know, at any rate (or maybe it’s just the way people behave when I’m around).   . . . Perhaps it’s some kind of drug […]

FDA Approves “Vegan Cows”

In a breakthrough of advanced biotechnology and cunning marketing, Amalgamated Universal Biotech Inc. (AUBI) announced that its Vegan Cow has now been approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA). AUBI claims that its new product, secretly developed in Hidden Underground Research Labs (HURL), is 100% plant based and suitable for vegan consumption. This news […]

The Zombie in My Room

Modern Life™ has never been more dangerous than at present. Not only do we suffer from all the ordinary dangers which have plagued the human race for millenia—disease, accident, invading Persians, hungry Tyrannosauri—but we now have at least fourteen utterly new kinds of hazards, each one completely without precedent. I am not here thinking primarily […]

Clean Trash Technology

While the EPA has given the American landscape some good scrubbings in the past with the Clean Water Act and the Clean Air Act, its latest proposition will trump all these past accomplishments. The EPA is proposing a new requirement for Clean Trash Technology, which experts say will reverse the problems of landfills in America. […]

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