Car

Hi-Viz Black

It used to be that bright colors really got you noticed. Fire engine were painted the imaginatively named fire engine red so that they’d stand out among the mob of black model-T Fords, and red haired girls stood out amid the blondes and brunettes. These days, however, fire engines look muted and tasteful—you hardly even […]

Automotive Underbody Cameras

Having you ever been driving along, thinking of this and that (or perhaps even of the other thing), when all of a sudden, without prelude, warning, or justification, you are seized and overpowered by an urge to see the asphalt directly under your car? If you have, you know that slamming on your brakes and […]

Robber Blamed for Motorists’ Collision

When George M. McCloskey held up a convenience store with a banana, he had no idea that he would be sued for causing a massive, three-car collision. Late one night, McCloskey entered a convenience store in Grove City, Ohio. He stuck a banana into the small of the clerk’s back, demanding “Your money or your […]

Aggressive Mode for Driverless Cars

Typical results of aggresive driving.

While mainstream automotive companies including Nissan™1, Audi™, and Toyota™2, and technology companies such as Google® and nVidia®3 have been making a lot of noise about driverless cars lately, the Barbie™ division of toy company Mattel® has been secretly testing more than fifty self-driving cars in a suburb of Chicago. Over the six months of testing, […]

New New York Law Allows Police to Ticket Drivers for “Being Mean”

Reckless driving is a serious offence, and typically involves endangering others’ well-being. But there is a definite number of drivers who are consistently rude, inconsiderate, and just plain mean, but who aren’t really guilty of reckless driving. “It used to be,” says NYPD sergeant Ronald Cole, “that we’d give them a ticket anyway. Maybe for […]

A Motorists Creed

Credo I believe in petroleum distillate. I believe that an expensive car enhances sexual fitness. That a car’s horsepower directly correlates to intelligence. That the larger your car is, the better you are. That if you pick your nose in your own car, nobody can see you. That I can drive safely while drunk, texting, […]

Lighter Air For Increased Efficiency

Content note: This article involves frank discussion of the molecular weights of different gasses and includes reference to professional bicycle racing. As anyone who has gone into a bicycle shop lately and tossed bicycles up into the air knows, much of what distinguishes a decent bicycle from an obscenely expensive bicycle is weight. For the […]

Woman Jailed for Philosophical Malpractice

As if Socrates’ trial and execution were not evidence enough, from the streets of New York City comes new proof that philosophy and politics don’t mix. Melissa Rosser, Associate Professor of Philosophy at PUNY, is a specialist in ancient philosophy. Among other areas of interest, she has written several books about the paradoxes of Zeno, […]

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