Alien

History of Soccer

While it is widely believed that the origins of soccer lie in the British Isles,1 new research by xenobiologist Tot Tibor reveals that this is almost certainly not the case. Ancient records indicate that the game was introduced into North America by extraterrestrials, with the first match reportedly played on the current site of the […]

Cow-Shark Discovered on Exoplanet

Last Wednesday, astronomers made an astonishing accidental discovery while studying the atmospheric composition of the exoplanet Gliese 581 c. Their observations demonstrated with absolute certainty that the planet is inhabited by an animal which has come to be popularly known as the Cow-Shark. Cindy C. Carnell, a xenoethologist at the State University of Northern South […]

Bermuda Triangle Actually A Hexagon

The Bermuda Triangle: The area between Miami (Florida), Bermuda, and San Juan (Puerto Rico) where aliens perform unspeakable procedures on helpless human subjects without obtaining informed consent, where pilots and navigators are routinely unlucky, or where nothing particularly unusual happens (but people like to make up creepy stories about it anyway). Last year, The Flying […]

Time T to Occur

If you’ve been around a little while, you’ve probably heard quite a few references to Time T. In case you haven’t heard about time T yet, here are some of the typical things that scientists say will happen at time T: Economics: At time T, the original investment of $10,000 will have tripled. Physics: At […]

Conclusive Evidence of Ancient Aliens

Photo by Lynn Locifero, © The Flying News.

For the first time ever, conclusive proof of Ancient Aliens has been found. While excavating a hidden passage underneath the temple of Teotihuacán©, Tot Tibor, xenoarcheologist at the International Hungarian University, discovered a tablet made of a material that proved to be PVC plastic. Inscribed on the plastic tablet was a message composed of punctuation […]

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