Repurposing: Wine Storage

Do you like wine? If you do, you may wonder where best to store your wine. There are, of course, a lot of boring commercial options—wine barrels, wine racks, and wine coolers. But if you don’t really like these options, if you prefer something original and exciting, then stay tuned . . .

(Noise and static while we think.)

Well, we’ve been thinking about the problem of wine storage, and we have two really wonderful ideas: Electronic organs, and IV bags.

If you want a wine storage solution that shows you have really classic taste, then you want electronic organ wine storage. Since electronic organs are available in a wide range of styles, from Classical to Heavy Metal, you can adapt this solution to your personal decor. This is how you go about it:

  • Procure an electronic organ, and put it in your preferred wine drinking location.
  • Rip out the electronics,1 but leave the on/off switch, since you might need to turn your wine off or on.
  • Fill the organ with wine.

If you can’t fit all your wine in your new wine organ, uncork the rest of the bottles and pour them into an IV bag. While we don’t recommend injecting the wine directly into a vein,2 you can run an IV line so that it hangs over your wine drinking location, and then squirt the wine right into your glass, or even into your mouth.3
Salemer_Münster_Orgel_Spieltisch_rechts


Photos: “Botas de oloroso en una bodega de Jerez de la Frontera,” by El Pantera, CC-BY-SA-3.0 via Wikimedia Commons.

“Schwarz-Orgel von 1900/1901: Spieltisch” by Saberhagen, CC BY-SA-3.0 via Wikimedia Commons.

  1. Give them to a passing teenager, and see what happens.
  2. That would be a waste, since you wouldn’t be able to taste it as well.
  3. Or ear, if you prefer.

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