Painless Entertaining

Do you feel apprehensive when you think about entertaining? Entertaining can be stressful, especially when your guests drill holes in the walls. But if you follow our advice, you can make sure that your distinguished guests remember the time spent in your home for the rest of their lives.1

  • In order to keep your guests from becoming restless, plan some interesting activities. We suggest taking them outside to look at the clouds, making mud pies, or practicing voiced glottal stops.
  • Food is important. Be sure to use a certified™ recipe from The Flying News, such as Cocoa Chaos or Salmon Cake.
  • In order to prevent mishaps, plan your entertaining with safety in mind. Make sure to attach a warning label to anything that might cause an injury, including knives, drills, firearms, dynamite, and toothpicks.
  • If you’re the introverted type, you might be happiest if your company never shows up. If you decide to take this route, invite your company for a time when you know they won’t be available, or build a high stone wall without doors around your house.
  1. Whether they remember it fondly or with horror depends on a number of factors, which will be discussed in a future column.

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